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January 31, 2008
Sweat
Unfortunately not from time on the mat. I feel better about my yoga activities this trip but not to the place I'd them to be.
I got up this morning, packed everything and drove The Son over to Microsoft where he sat in a conference room while I had a meeting at the other end of the conference room. Strangely enough, in today's world, I didn't bat at an eye at telling my client "Sure, I can make that meeting but my kid will be with me." Love me or leave me. Here I am.
I spent the rest of the afternoon playing on the team and hoping my project delivers when it is supposed to deliver. At 3:30, when my ride to the airport was still madly pounding on the keyboard, I got a bit nervous. When we were driving down the freeway, almost downtown Seattle and I noticed it was 4:05pm, I realized we would be hard pressed to catch our 5pm flight. Got dropped off on the side of the road, ran, carrying a Spongebog carry on, two computer bags and two carry on bags filled with ski clothes to the check in kiosks. I had two going at the same time (a man even commented on my prowess to be using two at the same time).... but it wouldn't let me check in.. too late.
I run to the first class check in, no line there! The lady tells me I have like 30 seconds to check in or even she will be locked out. Get passes, get in security, strip, re-clothe and run to the gate. RUN. Spongebob bag, 9 year old and two computer bags... sweat.. find plane 10 minutes late. Run 9 year old to get the magazine and gum I promised... run back... find the plane is now an hour delayed.
But it left nevertheless... a bumpy flight back..the kind where ordering another glass of wine feels worth it. In a chat with the flight attendant, she told me that in 20 years of flying she's never been on a flight nor has her husband, a pilot, that blew an engine. She said that really IS an emergency. Crazy talk.
Cirque Du Soleil tomorrow. Fun.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 2:29 AM | Comments (2)
January 30, 2008
Ah... Life.
I love life. No really... I know I bitch and moan but, realistically, life is just awesome. I've got two great amazing little kids and a bunch of people that love me. What more could you want? It comes in all flavors and sizes... that's what I love about life. Your life and mine, they are so individualistic and so personal, no matter how close we might be. Right DjM?
I had a really really shitty night last night. Drama, tired, stressed... the brink of capacity.. and I spilled over. I spilled over into that definitive place that is called B, I, T, C, H
It's okay really. I totally see it now. It's a consistent recent message that I have so many things to learn.. and so much love to get me there.
I got to drive in the snow this weekend. We drove to a ski resort. Me and two kids. The car had one of those sport packages on it so it doesn't slip in the ice or snow or whatever it was. It was cold. Really, really cold. I didn't go snowboarding but everyone else did. I sat and huddled in the lodge, working, trying desperately to find an Internet connection.
----
and now I'm cut off... the work is calling... the time isn't getting longer... oh onto the next emergency.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 1:36 AM | Comments (1)
January 25, 2008
Oh The Willowy Weed
Don't you hate when you are typing and the entire thing just goes away. BOOM lost everything. I had this lovely blog post about the willowy weed of discipline... but let's just cut to the chase. I didn't practice this morning. It was cold outside (holy cow), JumpsThruSomeday txt'd me to say she wouldn't be there and my clothes were overcome with someone's left over fuzzy sweater that they looked as if I'd taken a dot marker and made polka dot yoga clothes.
I have bitten my nails off further than they ever have been... ever.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 2:07 AM | Comments (2)
January 23, 2008
Never
Never.
Nope.
Never.
Never going to like the cold. Never going to think "Whoohoo seasons are here." No, I like Southern California and, frankly, I am totally a California Princess. Warm weather for the cold blooded.
Arrived in Seattle late on Sunday night but got up at 530 for yoga Monday. Took a shower so I could go straight to the office from practice, made some coffee (but spilt half of it all over the floor prior to leaving) and found my way west side. I ended up putting my mat right behind JumpsThruSomeday and Carl. For the third time in a row, I forgot balancing poses. I have no idea what is going on with me that I'd suddenly forget balancing. Then tonight I spent about fifteen minutes doubting my memory as to whether balancing came after prasaritas or after parsvottanasana. What gives?
Practice on Monday was good. The room was fairly cold but I was glad to be up and doing my practice. I was a bit worried by how long it would take me to get to the office and a conference call that I had so I flew through practice and then somehow it was only 8:15 when I was done. I was stoked to find out the shala has a shower :) AND the office is only like 15 minutes away (University Village).
I didn't practice asana today - moon day... but tomorrow I am taking one of my colleagues to the noon Mysore class at the other studio here. He's never done ashtanga but seems interested enough to make lunch out of it. I've been getting back to the mode of being selfish about my practice. As well I should be, I suppose but I end up debating whether or not the appropriate attitude is "I will go slow and help him through primary" or "Screw this, it's my yoga time, I'm going to do my whole practice because I need to." Not very yogic, is it?
On the other hand, the new found and old lost discipline appears to be somewhat revitalized. I've been eating better. The worst thing I've eaten was tonight when we went to Cafe Flora and I had the Oxaca tacos. I've switched to drip coffee instead of the fancy espresso drinks. I've been eating, if anything, in the mornings raw fruit. For the most part, I haven't been eating until about 1pm and, even then, only soup. I've turned down the pizza and the pasta and the carbo lunch loads and have found a cute little soup kichen down the street from the office (Nana's Soup House) where I've been getting a tomato basil soup with a thin slice of freshly baked potato bread (that is delightful).
This trip, in an effort to be more like myself, I brought along The Soul of Rumi. In honor, today's Rumi:
A Deep Nobility
There are degrees of nearness. Simply by existing,
every creature lives near
the creator, but there's a nobility deeper than just
being. The sun warms
generally the mountainside, but it illuminates the shaft
of a gold mine. The bush will
never know how the sun is with gold. There are dead
branches and live branches
full of sap. The sun brings flowers nad fruit from one
and more withering to the
other. Don't be the kind of ecstatic who feels ashamed
when he or she comes
back to normal. Be a clear and rational lunatic whom
the most intelligent human
beings follow. Don't be a cat toying with a mouse. Go
after the love lion. You have
inflated yourself with imagination. Drink in rather the
soul of Khidr, who doesn't
flinch when it's time to die. All winter you carved
water jars out of ice.
How well will they hold the summer snowmelt?
Posted by ashtangagirl at 12:08 AM | Comments (3)
January 20, 2008
Pigged Out
This morning I went to The Daughter's basketball game. It was awesome. I've never yelled so loud at one of my kid's sports. They got zonked 8 - 0 but it was a great game. The Daughter made a killer block (remember these are first graders) and came close on a few baskets. The ref was great.. he didn't call all the traveling he'd whisper "dribble" once each time and then call them if it went on. The Daughter's tall but she doesn't have that competitive streak I see in other kids. Her brother doesn't have it either. And the competitive streak is not bad... it's the drive to be better, the one that pushes you to keep on trying. We have to up the stakes for ourselves. If we don't, we sit in comfort, silent or not. At least, for me, that's what gets me up the next morning. This has nothing to do with yoga or asana. It has to do with just being human. What she does have is fun and that's the other half of the equation.
I'm making some pretty tough big changes in my life right now. I'm so isolated that it's really easy to feel very alone. It's not that I don't have wonderful people who want to spend time with me and be my friend... it's that I'm never freakin' home to do anything. When I am home, it is all about the kids because of the big changes from last year.. it's hard enough to do as it is. I'm feeling very out of control and chaotic. The easy road feels all wrong and the hard road seems like a different reality. The hard road feels like the right choice but the challenge seems like Bakasana B. So tonight I decided I had to stop whining and just step up to the plate and do it. I had a conversation last night with someone at work where I explained that's what I want everyone at the office to do... so I should do it too.
I spent about 20 minutes tonight trying to find the "place" in Bakasana B. I discovered that it's really important not to cheat and lift one foot and then the other. I still don't feel comfortable in it but I maybe got a glimpse of somewhere.
I was supposed to be going to dinner with this yogi that I know... We've been trying to go out to dinner for about 6 months now. That's my social life. That's it in a nutshell. Sadly I discovered that I have almost more a social life in Seattle. I have two sets of friends, JumpsThruSomeday and then The Sarcastic Brit from MSFT and Mr. Racecar Driver with his Faster Than Him Wife. I go out to dinner usually with someone while I am in town. I won't be going out to dinner with any one until I get a new phone. I just found out I have voice mails from YESTERDAY... the stupid thing never notifies me when I have voice mail... so I just think no one has called me. Inevitably people end up txting me now.. it's often the only way to reach me because, for whatever, reason, txting works better on my phone than the phone. Friday, a client told me I have the worst phone he's ever heard.
So I'm getting an iPhone from work tomorrow. I'm not confident that I'll be a convert so it will be an interesting test. Maybe THEN I'll know when people call me... somehow I doubt that will help my social life but at least I won't feel like a schmuck.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 1:34 AM | Comments (6)
January 18, 2008
I Suck
Yes, my friends, it is time for another I Suck post. In this post I shall lament how I've spent way more money than I have lately and I must stop. Must stop.
Just like the host of other things I've been telling myself I must stop. I own up to saying "Oh I can do this for two years..." and now realizing two years is a long time to live in hell. It's just too much... it's not that any one part of it sucks.. just too much all at once.
Just like I will get to my mat daily.. I must stop.
I think I will need help.
Practice today was just consistent. I've stopped embellishing the practice and just doing it. I am not jumping through anymore. Instead I am trying to find some tiny string of a bandha by trying to jump up and engage something. I think I maybe get an inch but I still don't feel anything. It's okay, practice and all is coming.
I'm ashamed to admit that I didn't even try Bakasana B. It's just, with every other pose I've been faced with so far, it's been a pipe dream but one I knew that I could at least figure out eventually. As I laid down for savasana today I thought "I'll never understand this pose." Yes, I realize, I need a new mantra. It's just... beyond me. I suppose that is why I will stay here, at Bakasana B, for a long time. That's all okay too. I don't need another pose. I'm already exhausted when I finish my practice now. New poses don't excite me anymore. It's an interesting shift.
In light of Lauren's comment the other day, I was paying attention today to all the places that I "feel" from my surgery. I wonder if any of it is due to the fact that I had a practice before all of this happened to me and I know what it felt like then... now I notice where there's a sharper edge or pain or discomfort where before it wouldn't have been.
For example, Mari B used to be my hands down favorite pose. The pose, physically, was never difficult for me but it held my heart. If I was sad or tired or stressed or scared (especially scared), Mari B was my escape, the safe part of myself. For awhile the picture on my blog was of me in Mari B for exactly that reason. Now, Mari B, it isn't that it is an effort. It is just different. While doing the pose probably looks the same on the outside, it is the inside that has changed. The non-moving, only squishable so far breasts consistently get in the way of me having a full release in that pose. I struggle to get them up and past my leg so that I can extend the spine further. Something I never had to do before. I notice every single day that I do the pose that it is different, that it isn't the safe space within like it used to be.
Don't get me wrong, it's not that Mari B is the only place where the silence sleeps but, for years, it was my favorite place. The place where the groove was just the groove and the emptiness was all around.
I have asked myself a couple times whether I regret having surgery. I don't. It sucks to be reminded all the time and to feel self-conscious about whether they look right. I suppose part of the healing path is just accepting that they are what they are. I do get sad that my practice is nowhere near physically where it was prior to surgery. So many things I can't do anymore... and maybe will some day... but not now. It's not about the poses, it's about the integration of the pose as I described above. I have so much work to do, the next pose holds no challenge for me.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 12:49 AM | Comments (8)
January 17, 2008
I'm So Sad
Tuesday the studio is having a Satsang. There will be kirtan and my teacher is "reflecting" on the past 20 years of Ashtanga in Encinitas. I was all set to go, in my calendar, cleared with TWB... and then reality came crashing down on me today that if Idon't go to Seattle and manage this project, there's a great likelihood it won't come a success.
While I have plenty to fill my days when I travel to Seattle and it isn't all bad, I really wanted to stay here this week. I have plans and all. *sigh*
So now I leave on Sunday for Seattle for a week and a half. Fortunately The Son is meeting me up there on Thursday. He is flying alone. I am freaking out. The thought literally makes me feel sick to my stomach. A lot of people have told me they did it as children or their children do it frequently but I just can't imagine... and, yet, here I go, I'm gonna let it happen. I guess I'll be able to imagine it really soon.
I'm a little stressed about this trip... I just *have* to find a way to make practice like normal. All of this shit with cars and late night work and whatnot, well, it just has to be part of life and my life has always included my practice. I can't let that fall apart if this is a regular travel schedule.
I've practiced not showering after practice but showering before for a couple days. It isn't as bad as I thought it would be... or, then, maybe desperation has finally found it's way to the surface.
Practice today was first series only. I practiced next to OKRGR which is always good energy and honesty. My body was heavy and tired. Stamina thing. Not enough practice. I'm just so disgusted with my body. The changes in it since I started taking those hormones (or the travel) are just horrid. I am this close to stopping the hormones. They have really messed me up physically but emotionally and pain-wise they are awesome. What a trade off!
I've started a mini-cleanse. Just taking some super cleanse and eating fruit until I eat something for dinner. I should eat earlier but it works out better 'cause I can just sit and work and munch on some fruit... then cook something later. Tonight I made a corn chowder (by putting the cooked veggies and stock in a blender) for dinner. The Kids don't eat it but TWB likes it well enough. I'm hoping I'll notice some difference if I do something and, right now, it is about as much as I can muster.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 12:52 AM | Comments (3)
January 15, 2008
Juice
I have a new project with some people in India. This requires me to be up at 5am for calls M/W/F This is good for yoga, I hope...
Yoga this morning was good. Sweaty and standard. Nothing spectacular. The new adjuster has taken me to giving me an adjustment in Prasarita C. I've always been able to get my hands down the regular way but I really like the adjustment in the reverse direction. The adjuster takes a long time too, really prying my clenched hands to the right places. The stretch through my surgical area is pretty intense and borders on too much throughout the adjustment. It's that slight edge... I hate that there is the edge but it also makes one more aware... of something.
It's 9:30 and I haven't even showered from practice this morning.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:48 PM | Comments (4)
January 14, 2008
Safe, Sound & Infatuated
Seattle was beautiful today... but I was sad that yesterday I missed Seattle yoga because of flying and today Seattle doesn't have yoga. So last night I went to a 10pm movie... I never do that... We saw I Am Legend. I thought it was scary.
I made it home safetly today but the rigors of traveling got the best of this little yogi and I ended my trip literally yelling at the baggage claim agent and walking out on her in front of about 7 people ... I felt bad but it really was just not right of her. She refused to help me and then, as it turns out, as I told her, my bag wasn't on the plane... and then she miraculously found it at the counter. She even called my home later and apologized. She did know what she did was wrong but I still feel guilty for letting it rip.
Yoga today consisted of 20 minutes of lifts in the bathtub where I can lift and tilt as if going to jump back. Water is a miraculous thing.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 12:40 AM | Comments (5)
January 12, 2008
9 Lives
So WYPM ... I did some 10 minute stretch routine every night. I went to the noon improv class at Troy's on Thursday... I had a lovely bottle of wine last night and then up at 4:30am to catch and early morning flight. The clouds were beautiful once you were on the other side. I was listening to the Hanuman Chalisa and boom the plane banked right and there was this really "strange" noise. I reached out and grabbed the lady next to me and said "What was that?" She looked a little nervous and said "I don't know" calmly. I said "Are we ok?" She said "I don't know," still quite calmly.
Things evened out a bit.. I was nervous as heck. Scared stiff. Literally... a short bit later the captain came on the intercom and told us that we had blown an engine, were 30 minutes from the nearest airport and were turning back to make an emergency landing in Portland. He also assured us everything was okay and that they could fly and land with one engine. That it's pretty routine, they practice it every year in the FLIGHT SIMULATOR!!!!
Yes, I panicked. You bet your ass! I think I vascillated between being told to breathe and chanting sita ram quietly into my shawl with my hands mock Garbha Pindasana. Well, okay, only the lady next to me and one flight attendant noted my severe distress but, still....
It was a bit eerie to land and see the runway cleared of all aircraft and lined with emergency vehicles. I waited in line about 30 minutes to try and figure out if we were getting home. I heard the 10am flight fill up, then the 4pm flight fill up and then the last seat on the last flight could have been mine... but the guy behind me, his brother's wedding was at 6pm and he wasn't going to make it for that and I couldn't take it. So, I had them, along with everyone behind me, reroute me back to Seattle. By the time it was my turn, the only flight out of Seattle with a seat was at 5...
It's okay, here I am in the northwest for one more night. I figure I can get on the plane because what are the odds it will happen again! :)
Improv class was nice. Hot and a bit different than traditional but still nice. I enjoyed it tremendously and he also does a Mysore class on Wed at noon which I think will come in valuable to my schedule.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 8:35 PM | Comments (2)
January 7, 2008
The Gas Man
Remarkably better today. Interesting that. Interesting timing the world sometimes has.
Expected late night or early morning... no yoga this morning. Went to work, produced... came back and practiced. 1/4 practice... the heater in the house is "broken" (as a result of the owner being on vacation in Mexico and not paying his bill)... I had socks on, a couple shirts.. but I was still freezing... that in between space of having what feel like the verge of sweat but not really ever happening. Ah well... practice nonetheless.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 9:49 PM | Comments (0)
January 6, 2008
WoYo-Sick-Mo
Blah.. up all night... throat feels like it is on fire... can't stop coughing or feeling like my head might explode. Yoga today: 5 minutes of halasana. It was actually really enjoyable. A 2 minute uttanasana. A 1 minute backbend... a 1 minute Uttanasana.. then a bunch of half moon poses...
Sweeehhhwweehhh didn't think I was gonna account for 10 minutes there.
This morning my friend took me to her naturopath/chiropractor. He did a bunch of stuff and then pronounced my intestines all messed up. Cleanse. So is the prescription. It's funny to me how this seems so normal and yet most people go, huh, what? Anyway, I had already bought some cleansing materials as I was gonna do a half juice fast at the beginning of the year.... Looks like I really should do that. Surprisingly or not, I felt much better afterward and I've continued to feel somewhat better all afternoon.
I came *this* close to feeling like I should do a whole practice when I remembered that I often find I get sicker from that exertion rather than better. So I didn't. I stuck with my 10 minutes. Tomorrow I hope will be better.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 8:12 PM | Comments (0)
January 5, 2008
MVP
After you make so many flights on a carrier you can get into their "MVP" program. I always thought these were a little lame but since I got mine, I get it. I can upgrade to first class if a seat is available for free. I've done this enough that I'm now in touch with the experience of flying first class versus coach.
Today's WoYoPracMo was dedicated to the MVP card I know carry for it allowed me to sit in ardha virasana til Portland and then switch to padmasana until Seattle.
I'm sick. I knew it when I woke up at 3:30 the other night. My throat hurts like hell and I feel all foggy and crappy. I hate flying like that... even more, I hate traveling like that. I was supposed to be going out with some friends tonight but, instead, I ate some soup and had some tangerine juice and I'm watching a movie. It's cold up here. For the first time I am bringing stuff up here to "leave." My yoga mat has been here for 6 months but I'm gonna leave some yoga clothes here too. All in the name of learning to pack lighter so that I don't have to check a bag. Flying first class and having carry on makes traveling at least an hour faster. I get it now.
I was planning on practice tomorrow but we'll see how I am when I wake up. Until then, tea, blankets and movies.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 11:23 PM | Comments (1)
January 4, 2008
UHHHHHH AAARRRRGGGG UUUHHHHH
I woke up at 3:30am. I'm not sure why but I started to feel like I was getting sick maybe. Dread.
I woke up again at 5:20. I had the not-seen-for-a-long-time debate with myself:
It's too early to go to practice.
Too cold.
I'll be tight.
I could practice here at home.
I have so much to do.
Yada
I got out of bed at 5:50, threw on clothes, washed my face, downed a shot of espresso, took some Motrin and was on my mat and doing a Sun Salutation by 6:30. Done with first around 7:30. Done with second at 8:10... outta there at 8:30.
Practice: Lovely... lovely... lovely... I love my practice right now. Like the old shoe it used to be.... ah... so nice. (Barely toes in Kapotasana today... the adjuster put my left hand in first and I've noted if I don't do right hand first, I can't do it.... The Man admonished me for Bakasana B today.... my arms were like jello from giving the rest of my practice my all so I made two very meager atttempts and moved on).
Upon which I drove like a bat out of hell to make an appointment at The House to get my blood taken for life insurance. The guy shows up and I'm dripping sweat. OH well.
From there I went to a super painful appointment (I can't believe I did it)...
and now I'm desperately trying to get some work done, get packed for Seattle, get to my parents (an hour away) for our final holiday celebration...
Posted by ashtangagirl at 4:30 PM | Comments (6)
Title-Less
What else to blog about but that practice today was nice. I didn't want to hope to revisit the joy of practice Tuesday.. those practices, these days, are more sweet than regular. Practice was good. I got my heels again in Kapotasana with help. I came up with a big gasp and the Yoga Fairies again. By the time I got to Bakasana B, I gave a meager half of an attempt and socked it in. I just had nothing left.
I just don't get Bakasana as a whole. I mean, I get the parlor trick but I just don't think I know what a bandha is. One day I will like Bakasana. I mean it will happen one day.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 12:11 AM | Comments (2)
January 3, 2008
Happy Anniversary
Man, I just lost a whole blog post.... don't know what key I hit... don't you hate that!
Today is the anniversary of my blog for what appears to be 6 years now. Six years ago, The Daughter wasn't even one. It is hard to believe that her near entire life is written in this blog. Aside from recently, it's pretty much an open book here and I suppose if someone read from start to end they'd actually know a lot about me.
I wonder what it will be like to read at 60... or what my kids will think when they are 30 and read it. I hope they are interested enough in me to read it.
WoYoPracMo today consisted of an early morning and lengthy 7th Series practice. Got some caffeine and drove straight to the Wild Animal Park. We got there right when the gates opened and were the first ones in. The gorillas did a show for us and The Son and I really loved the Larikeet Landing (but The Daughter a soul tormenting too afraid to do it, wanted to do it so bad she could neither stay nor go). After 5 hours of walking and seeing, I then practiced a good solid couple hours of Restraint Yoga. It started off pretty good. I was able to withstand the incessant need during Don't Open Your Mouth pose of interjecting the meeting I was attended with "What the hell are you people thinking?" or "OMG we hired a criminal (short and very funny story)." At some point in the second meeting, during, Really You Just Shouldn't Say Anything pose, I face planted. I knew I needed to find time for WoYo so I did a downward dog, a couple jumps trying to find some bandhas... I did some Ustrasana.... I did some hanumanasana.. I did some pigeon... I did padmasana.. you know.. the 10 minute obligatory yoga WoYoPracMo :)
Now I'm practicing Patience Pose. I really struggle with this one. Fear. You know it gets you every time!
Posted by ashtangagirl at 12:00 AM | Comments (5)
January 1, 2008
Heels In the New Year
WoYoPracMo started this morning. I had a glass of wine with dinner last night and that was it.... early to bed... rise, shower, take some Motrin (for the knee) and down a double shot... drive to practice.
I am always amazed on New Year's Day that there is no one out on the street early in the morning. Is everyone hung over?
Not the yogis though... practice was crowded... really crowded... and, as a result, the prana and the energy was ecstatic. We started practice with the Hanuman Chalisa. The AYC Tuesday tradition and today is Tuesday. After the Chalisa, we chanted the invocation together... something we don't do at our studio. After a few weeks of practices that sucked ass, that were tight and heavy and just outright miserable, I needed today's practice. That first Uttanasana when I realized "okay, today will be a normal practice..." was long overdue. The first few sun salutations I had to tame the monkey in the brain "Julie, just do your practice... whether it is good or bad doesn't matter.. that's your perception. Tight or loose, heavy or light.. just shut up and do."
First series was nice... no drama... felt like home.. like it has for a few years now. Just normal without drama... without pain... First part of second was good... and then came Ustrasana and Laghu. I fell out of Laghu. My mat was so slippery that my knee slipped and my wrists curled over my heels and, well, I fell back... and I didn't do it again. Instead I setup for Kapotasana and was oh so pleasantly surprised when, without using my hands on my hips, I could see the floor... back.. black.. mid foot on my own, head off the ground... arms straight. So I did it a second time hoping for an assist. I could see my teacher next to me.. but it never came. When I came up from the second he said "Are you satisified with that?" I said "No, but you never came to help!" Third times a charm... back... straight arms, no pain, no drama.. hand to my hand... inhale... there's the heels... grip the heels... hand on my other hand.. oops... too much sweat, hand slipped off... put hand back... put other hand on heel... drop head... slip a little bit... manage to keep my fingers all the way over heels even after my helper went away... breathe.. inhale...exhale... straight arms..up... Yoga Fairies.
I still can't land Bakasana B. Of course, I also am not giving it 100%. Too much fear.
My drop backs felt lovely today too... and the assistant did something different with me on the last one I think because I was closer to my feet than normal. He pushed really hard through the thighs the way my teacher used to when I was "finding my legs" and then rotated them in almost forcing me to spring up.
Ah... a nice good THAT'S WHAT I LOVE ABOUT ASANA practice. I needed one of those... desperately.
Jaya Hanuman!
Happy New Year.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 2:48 PM | Comments (8)
The Edge Of The Blogosphere
I said to someone today "If I could, I'd blog about that."
For the rest of the day I've pondered on and off what I mean by that. I mean, I can... so it's not like I can't... but there is that line of what is just too much for this unknown vast hole and that's the edge of the blogosphere. Unfortunately for you devoted ;) readers, so many of the tumultus encounters of my little self-enclosed world are on the other side of that line. I suppose you'll all live.
Yes, I am blogging on New Year's Eve. Why not. These days when I have a moment of none brain engaged time, I like to take a bath, sleep and actually write in my blog or just read... or both! The idea of going out tonight sounded good for like 5 minutes and then I decided why bother. I don't want to drink, I don't want to be up late... Tomorrow starts WoYo and I'm really gonna try. Even 10 minutes a day if that is all I can I do... that's what I'll aim to do. I just hope I can commit to opening the blog everyday.
Tonight we made homemade pizzas, rolling out the door... a bottle of The Ditch Digger ala Jenna...
2008 is such an unknown for me. I have absolutely no clue where the year is at, going, should go... it's like riding on the edge of some vast abyss. I'm not sure if it is better to fall in or stay out.
Happy New Year...
Tomorrow, a practice, Black Eyed Peas and Cornbread (YUM)...
Posted by ashtangagirl at 1:02 AM | Comments (2)