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July 5, 2007
Sorta Like The First Day of School
I unfurled my mat this morning with something akin to dread. During the first sun salutation I considered leaving. During the second I made a decision to only do first series. Then I got over my ego and just did the practice. I was weak. I didn't want to jump through, I didn't want to do anything extra but I had a solid, regular practice nonetheless. I even did second (when I looked at the clock and realized I had breezed through full primary in an hour) and was surprised to find that I could get just above mid-foot in Kapotasana on the first try.
During 9am practices I sometimes bring my cell phone. I do this because it is a strange time for practice and I do have a "real job" and sometimes shit happens in that time span. Today I was worried about a client responding to an early morning email so I brought it. About 10:15 I got an email from my tattoo artist saying he had a cancellation at noon and could I come by for the ink I had already paid for. The last minute notice, no planning, spontaenous, YES let's just get it done right now were the ignition. I got confirmation that I could be done in an hour (I had a meeting at 1:30 with a client on-site) and so I whipped through finishing before 11am, quick Shavasana (Okay I wouldn't even call it one but I pretended) and then raced back to Torrey Hills, grabbed a shower some client-presentable clothes and back to Encinitas.
When I got there my artist had drawn out the word trust for me. When I told him last month that was what I wanted, I hadn't specified any particular flavor of the word (ie., cursive, font, etc.) just the word. As I was driving there today I realized I didn't know or really car what flavor I wanted... there were so many reasons that each flavor was perfect. So when I walked in and saw the one he'd drawn, I looked at it for 2 seconds and said "Let's Go!"
Then we talked about placement and he didn't think it would look good where I wanted it.... I told him originally I had wanted it on my inner wrist but was worried about my professional appearance with it on my wrist. In the end, after we talked about it, I decided I was going to get it where I wanted to get it so I did. I can't hide it... and, oh well, if someone doesn't want my kick ass brain because of a wrist tattoo, I don't need them. Trust in myself, trust in the moment, trust in God, trust in instinct, trust in everyone I've surrounded myself closely with, trust that this too is right.
The more I've looked at it tonight, the more amazingly perfect it is. I love it. It's the perfect blend. I have 6 tattoos now.... Each one means something so amazingly perfect right down to the mistake on my back (think about that one for a minute!).
I went straight from the shop, my wrist inflamed and a bit swollen (if you've ever seen the mess of veins on my wrist, you'd know why) and went straight to my most conservative client's office. It burned a bit so I was uber aware of it each time I lifted my hand to talk. Isn't it funny how you just stare at a new tattoo?
(P.S. Nope, it didn't hurt. I was surprised because I was really tripping out on the anticipation of pain especially considering my wrists are tiny and fragile for my body size and really veiny with no extra skin... anyway he put the needle down and I was like, okay, this okay.. breathe in and breathe out. I mean, sure, there were a couple places where I mouthed SH*T but, I totally want to do the other wrist now and it was really no big deal at all! ;>).
The kids and I made Spongebob Macaroni & Cheese. I caved at the regular grocery store and told them they could get it as a treat. Neither one of them liked it which is a good lesson in the value of marketing to kids for them. After dinner we made smoothies together and watch some of Star Wars Episode V. I think I might even get to practice tomorrow and I'm debating doing Intro to Second. I would never normally think about a led class vs. Mysore but I've got nothing to do tomorrow night and, well, why the hell not!?
Today's Rumi (WOW... seriously when I do today's Rumi, I type it and then grab the book and let a page fall open... the last few have been amazingly spot on for me):
Lightning, your presence
from ground to sky.
No one knows what becomes of me,
when you take me so quickly.
I can break off from anyone,
except the presence within.
Anyone can bring gifts.
Give me someone who takes away.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 11:34 PM | Comments (1)
Lunch Hour Ink
Posted by ashtangagirl at 5:36 PM | Comments (3)
Hormonal or Just Tired
This morning we got up and ran to the grocery store... bought some blueberries but forgot the syrup... decided to make pancakes with just butter anyway. The Daughter had me fry her some bacon (I snuck a couple pieces).
I put together a big box of wood stuff today. Using a real hammer and screw driver.. it was great fun. The kids played on the computer next to me and, once done, The Husband took The Son to see the new Transformers movie while The Daughter and I went to Ceramicafe to paint some ceramics (I made a spoon rest and a candle holder). We had planned to do our annual Ranch parade but the kids said it was boring and we had no other motivation to go. Once we all reconnected, we had some dinner in the backyard and then I left to go do some more work but did make it out for fireworks on the bluff which we've done every year since The Son was born.
Today's Rumi:
Love is the way messengers
from the mystery tell us things.
Love is the mother. We are her children.
She shines inside us, visible-invisible,
as we lose trust or feel it start to grown again.
I haven't been on the mat in over a week. The practice and what it gives us inside is one of the few things holding me together right now... I have put my yoga clothes on the side of the bed... I have sworn, come hell or highwater, I will see my mat tomorrow.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 1:14 AM | Comments (1)