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April 29, 2007
It's Not An Omen....
It's not an omen... It's NOT an omen.
Tomorrow should be the first day of blissful, non-time-sensitive practices, for at least a little bit until I figure out what I'll be doing for work.....
instead my moon decided to come a day early... stupid moon...
I would just ignore it but normally it doesn't allow me to ignore it.
Practice today, however, was nice.... except for backbending. I've discovered that without second series, backbending isn't quite as lovely... my back isn't as ready to bend even though I'm trying really hard to pay attention to upward dog. During Supta K today, the guy next to me was really long legged as well.. this means in transitions involving Titibhasana or Konasana poses, it is difficult to work out a system... since I got into Kurmasana before him, I figured I'd wiggle into Supta K on the 3 count, get done on the 3 count for Supta K and transition out while he was moving to Titibhasana ... problem solved. Only my teacher apparently didn't like that I was coming out of the pose early or thought that I hadn't gotten into it on my own... so I tried to mumble "I started early..." and he said "Early?" while he crossed my legs again... I then hit the guy next to me trying to get out of it ;)
After backbending one of the assistants gave me a LOVELY adjustment in Paschimottanasana... it was really really deep... at one point she asked if I was okay and I said sure...she went a bit deeper and then I had no place to put the fake boobs... they wouldn't go any flatter and my body was pressed all the way against my thighs... so I whispered to her that I had nowhere to put them..she laughed... but then after I came up I felt like I had burnt my skin near where the implant is... this is a common feeling when I push too hard on the sides of the implant and I'm not sure what it is indicative of but it hurts like hell for a good 30 minutes.
Tonight I'm going out with some alternative parenting friends (ie., crunchy granola, homebirthing, non-vaccinating, type) that I haven't seen in years.... funny how much life changes when you don't have the (cloth) diapers anymore.
I had a brief brainwave on the way to practice that I could take the month of August and go to Mysore with the kids... I could pay Tiffany's way and she could be my nanny, agreeing to watch my kids while I practice and work a few hours a day. The Husband quickly shot it down. As supportive as the man is with my yoga practice, India is just not something he can put his mind around right now... he says someday... just not right now... and probably not with his kids.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 8:23 PM | Comments (12)
April 27, 2007
Genki Ka?
Today at work I wrote an email to someone not professionally related to me. I actually said that I was "over" the "nitty gritty" part of being a programmer. I've completely and totally lost the passion for being a software developer. I'd much rather just do yoga.
Damn the world.
This morning I went to take the kids to school with the plan that I could make practice by 8:15. I am still not really used to the fact that we now have Mysore from 7-11 in the mornings M/W/F. I forget that I could show up at 8 if it came down to it. It's a wierd experience later in the morning. Not as many people and a sort of quiet solitude. After getting my heel the other day in Kapotasana, my back has felt crappy. Today I just wasn't bending. It's cool though, some days you bend, some days you don't. If there has anything this practice has taught me is that truth. It applies to more than just asana.
In other asana news, because of my tardiness to practice of late, I recognized today how much I'm aware of the energy that is left in the room after the intense 7am Mysore class. You lay your mat down mid-practice for some, end of practice for others, your first sun salutation, socking up the energy of the person's mat who vacated the spot you are now holding. It's bot cool and slightly disconcerting.
I had the greatest evening. A couple moms on my street brought out some wine, the husbands all congregated talking about the pool construction and whatever the heck else is going on "manly" wise on our street. We talked about how we have PMS like no one's business, how we all pick fights with our husbands over assinine and mundane things and have no idea why and how we STILL always ask if we "look fat in this?" We had sunglasses on, tank tops and hats to block the sun, popped a few pop up chairs in the driveway, dogs under feet, kids romping around between trampoline, climbing the basketball posts (which is better than actually trying basketball), climbing a treet. A charming near-summer (it IS coming, summer) Friday night afternoon in suburbia. It was actually kinda cool.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:58 PM | Comments (5)
Flexibility
Thursdays I teach Kids Yoga so I don't get to practice at the studio. Normally I practice at noon with Kiran at the health club but today I had a meeting in Irvine at 1pm so that wasn't possible. I decided to live it up last night: I had two glasses of wine and a bowl of pomegranate ice cream (Yum!). I was only slightly disappointed at 8:42 when the school called to remind me there would be no yoga today since it was field trip day. :( Had I been a bit more prepared, I could have raced to practice, begged Tiffany for a shower and driven to my meeting but I wasn't prepared with computer, documents, brain, clothes, shower materials.... so I accepted that tomorrow would be practice.....
The Husband just asked me if I would take the kids to school... apparently there is a swell and a bunch of guys from his work are getting together at 7am to surf. How can I say no? Well, I know exactly how I could.... I also know that I cannot be so selfish :( So practice will happen for me tomorrow but not until the 9am class (which my teacher does not teach)... or I could do Intro to Second tomorrow night... mhmm... which sounds better?
I have so many offers for contract consulting work, I don't even know how to pick from them.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 12:04 AM | Comments (3)
April 25, 2007
Cinnamon
I had dinner with an old friend last night. I hadn't seen her in probably 4 years or more. It's always a bit wierd to catch up with someone after that long. There was never an idle moment of silence but I also never felt like we finished any of the thousands of conversations we started.
The other day my kids begged me for Lunchables. I may have become a complete sell out to the majority of alternative/crunchy-granola parenting values I started this journey with but buying a Lunchable is not one of the things that will ever happen in my house. So I came up with the idea of making a healthy lunchable. I bought a little container with divided parts and a big sandwich holder that folded up nicely. I bought an organic sourdough pizza crust, organic pizza sauce, organic mozzerella and a bunch of small fun items like small bags of Cheddar Bunnies, small bags of organic mini-Oreo type cookies (fruit juice sweetened, of course). I used a cookie cutter and cut out circles of the pizza crust and refrigerated them. I got up in the morning, baked the crust circles and put together a Lunchable Organic Style. I also got supplies to do the "turkey stacker" lunchable.
I packed this for them Monday. The Son told me it was one of the coolest ideas I've ever had as a parent... Last night when I got home The Husband told me I hadn't prepared their lunches and so I would need to get up in the morning to do it. At first I was a bit pissy about not being able to make yoga but then I figured, what the heck, I would practice at 9am, screw work, what, they gonna fire me :) I made the kids a healthy Lunchable, dropped the dog off at the groomer and went to practice.
I split today. I've never split before. I did to Navasana and then split to second series. There was only a few people in the room, one of them was the instructor who got me to my heels in kapotasana a couple weeks ago. The teacher today got her to her heels in Kapotasana for the first time... she was very happy... huge smiles, it is always nice to share in the joy of someone else's accomplishments. When it came my turn to do it, the teacher did the usual adjustment, almost can feel the heel but solidly above mid-foot... I came up and decided to do it again. The instructor from the other day offered to help me so she came over... and yep, she got my right hand to my heel but then I couldn't figure out how to get my other arm over and I wasn't fast enough and couldn't hang on... she told me when I came up I just need to whip the left hand back faster because the pause throws me off and then I can't pull it all back in.
I still can't land Bakasana A's exist.
I had sushi with Tiff after practice and then went to pick up Cinnamon The Cockapoo. When I dropped her off they told me she was so terribly matted that they'd have to shave her. As I stood waiting for her to come out, I saw this dog come out and this woman next to me starting talking to the dog and exclaiming over how cute... it took me until the lady holding the dog handed me the leash to realize it was my dog! I didn't even recognize her. She looks like a poodle! I know they had to do it to fix her hair but, man, she looks entirely like someone else's dog.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 4:21 PM | Comments (9)
April 24, 2007
Tiffany Sucks
Practice rocked today. Our teacher is back in town which means the room was packed and sweaty and humid... awesome... I love that. It is the first time since my last surgery I felt like all the pieces were there. My sides didn't hurt, my bandhas seemed to actually exist, I even got a "good" after Kapotasana. Lovely, lovely, lovely. Those kind of practices are better than caffeine. They can keep you on a high all day.
Yoga It's Better Than Caffeine.
I had to race all over town today, one meeting after another... wasn't entirely bad and the yoga high kept me going.
During one of the meetings, my phone rang... I didn't recognize the number and always worry in those cases whether it could be kid related so I excused myself to answer it. Instead of being important, it was the new store I found last weekend when I went to buy dog food. The new and dangerous store.
It's all Tiffany's fault though. Before I met Tiffany I would NEVER have worn a pair of high heeled shoes. The tallest shoe I bought was maybe 1.5" heels... but Tiffany convinced me to try them and so I did and that's when it happened. The bitch made me a Shoe Fiend. Last weekend when I bought dog food I happened to notice that my favorite pair of sandals was in the window of the store next door.... as it turns out it is the flagship store for the brand... and, so, you can see the problem... I bought shoes (which, of course, because my feet are so huge, had to be special ordered, hence the phone call today letting me know they had arrived). Not only did I buy shoes but I bought the coolest bag ever.
None of this would be horrible if I still had a job come Monday but I don't... and I don't have the money to buy shoes or a bag. I convinced The Husband to give me the bag as a Mother's Day gift that I just happened to pick out myself so, I've rationalized that one away...
I suppose there is no way to rationalize the shoes... I love them though.. they are on my huge honking feet right now... and, yes, they make me like 6'4". I wonder who else I can get to buy me a Mother's Day present ;)
So, thanks Tiff... Can you now get me onto something cheaper? ;)
Posted by ashtangagirl at 7:49 PM | Comments (1)
April 23, 2007
Work?????
Since Kathy came on Thursday I haven't been able to work. It's like I checked out and can't find my brain anymore. It's not like I don't have work to do, I just can't seem to do it. I ended up taking two days of vacation last week... and have to find my way into some billable hours for today.
I got up this morning at 5:40 and took Motrin...then went back to sleep. I think The Husband wondered what the heck I was doing. Even I didn't know. Walking up the stairs to practice today I told myself I'd just do half primary. My body is still winded and reeling from being so sick (and I was SIIICKKKK). I ended up doing all of primary minus jump throughs and then debated whether I had time to do second series or not. Tiff yelled over "Just do it!" Ah so encouraging we are in our studio. I didn't have time to fiddle faddle around like usual over second series since today was the big Helicopter Ride with The Son. So I just did every pose and moved on... I really wanted to work on walking my feet to my hands ala Kathy in Kapotasana but I was sore and tired and didn't have time.
After practice, I took The Son and we drove up to the airport for his helicopter ride. The Husband was pretty sure he would back out. The Daughter backed out this morning... but The Son seemed pretty excited about it. I was pretty surprised when he didn't hesitate, even a little bit.
He ended up sitting in the cockpit with the pilot while I sat in the back... we cruised over Legoland, down the coast, over La Jolla and then we actually got to cross right over the San Diego Airport, down to the bridge and then the pilot did a hard turn... and I mean we were horizontal to the ground. I was white knuckling it in the background... afraid The Son was going to freak out... when we righted again The Son yells "That was so cool, let's do it again!" I, on the other hand, thought I might puke.
We ventured back up the coast and then inland to go over our house and then on over the school. We made sure to do the fly over when all the kids were outside. The Daughter saw us and jumped up and down waving. The rest of the school was at lunch so only the kids on the outside could see us. I know The Son is hoping some of his friends saw.
Tomorrow... practice, work and then dinner with an old friend.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:46 PM | Comments (4)
April 20, 2007
That Old
I found my yoga mat! I also found my hamstrings, my quads, my biceps and that wierd little spot in your back when you are so tight backbends feel somewhat like self-torture than anything else.
KJS drove in on Thursday morning... we practiced at noon and I, after many many days of being ill, decided doing my whole practice would be a brilliant idea. The first day back always rocks. Kathy offered to adjust me in Kapotasana so I said sure! I thought it was very cool that she would offer... She was trying to have me walk my feet to my hands but I didn't really understand what to do after I actually got them there (which, truthfully, surprised the hell out of me). I sorta floundered and stopped breathing but I think it brought a sense of awareness to the pose for me. Like I've been spending so much time on the "bendy" part of it and not enough time focusing on the muscles to enabling me to push up.
My intent was to try it on my own in practice today. ....
After practice yesterday, we took the dogs to the beach. Gus loved it but Cinny was too afraid of all the other dogs, especially the little beagle thing that hounded her. We hung around in the back and Gus played in the Pacific Ocean. He was very happy. We also washed the grime off of Kathy's car (and, boy, was it grimy... she's traveled cross country in it!). That was fun, I haven't washed a car in a long time. Jenna showed up for dinner (with wine), Kiran and John came over for conversations about all the good yoga type things (yes, I realize the stupidity of that last bit). They ended up spending the night and we got up at 5:30 for practice.
That's when it hit me. After the very first sun salutation. It hit me how stupid it was to do that whole practice yesterday.
The Second Day is always the worst!
I actually caved at Bhujapindasana. Funnily enough, I actually gave it a try on the pose... I haven't been able to do chin down for two years since the first surgery (who can you believe it has been that long...well, not quite, but close) but I saw Kathy and Jenna do it and so I thought I should try... and I think I might have been able to do it but my body was so exhausted I couldn't find a way to do anything else... 3 backbends, quick finishing and then I sat and watched Jenna and Kathy do lovely Kapotasanas in unision followed by two lovely renditions of the tick tock routine ;-0
As of this moment, walking has me thinking romantic thoughts about the Motrin bottle in front of me.
After breakfast, the girls headed up the coast (whatdya get... did you walk straight back and to the right, no peeking?) again. It then proceeded to freakishly DUMP in San Diego. Not just rain but freaky wild raining. You should have seen the chaos at elementary school pick-up ;)
The life of a mom is never dull and boring... always pushing you past the edge of your comfort zone.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:06 PM | Comments (5)
April 17, 2007
Alive & Kickin'
It's been 7 days of basic, average and, dare I say, ordinary misery. I haven't seen a yoga mat in two weeks and that is just one sign of how completely far I've fallen. Today I have felt some semblance of normalcy and health. Isn't it strange just how far out of yourself being sick can take you. I still have horrendous aches in my hips and upper back but I resisted the Motrin today... I didn't find clarity but at least it feels like a day in the right direction.
I have to admit to being secretly pleased that today was a moon day. I had the intention of going to practice until I logged into my computer and, as always, made sure Ashtangi.NET hadn't blown up overnight and saw someone's post about the new moon. One more day to put off the inevitable.
I was in Irvine all day yesterday for meetings. I managed to demand and actually get something I needed for a project yesterday. I had drinks with 2 of the partners and a bunch of the "inner circle" boys... always interesting. They are actually a really great bunch of guys. Not sure about the grin f'n factor though.
One of the partners, however, offered my son a ride in the helicopter as a confidence booster. I really wasn't sure if he'd want to (nor did it bypass my notice that the offer was likely a nice way of demonstrating the company "perks" in the face of my resignation) but when I asked him he seemed really excited. I decided it had to be up to him to bring his little sister. His first inclination was a resounding no... but, later, he changed his mind and invited her. I was really proud of him and, more importantly, it made me feely good that they are close friends. They fight, punch, want to kill each other (well more him than her) but they are the best of friends, literally. They do nearly everything together. Tonight after we put him to bed, he created some map of some imaginary world and then decided they would get little "stickers" he made if they had "good behaviour." I asked him who decided and he said he did. The Daughter had one little sticker, The Son gave himself the "magic rainbow" because of his generosity in allowing his sister to come along on the helicopter ride (scheduled for sometime next week because, no matter what, that's an opportunity of a lifetime for a 9 year old kid so I'm going to give it to him)... it is only somewhat astonishing that if you get the "magic rainbow" sticker, you also get an extra 2 "bonus" stickers.
The Dog Trainer came over today. I really like him, he's not like the other dog trainer we used. Anyway, he immediately gave me this prong collar thing... he said it isn't a prong and he put it on my arm when I said I didn't think I could use it. 5 minutes into that collar she was a different dog, just more relaxed. It was wild. Our session ended up in a group session with the 6 month old Golden and the 2 year old Goldendoodle on the street. Cinny usually barked and growled and seem like the attack dog around them... the trainer got us all together and she just dealt with it and it was normal.... Both the other dog owners got the collars too. I'm still not sure about it but I used it again later for a walk and, while I was petrified of hurting her with it, she seemed completely relaxed and actually said hello to two other dogs. She's such a great dog! We really lucked out.
I wonder if I can even find my yoga mat.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:31 PM | Comments (2)
April 12, 2007
Big Huge Bummer
Man, being suck blows... my body aches so badly that I can barely stand it. I tried to stretch by touching my toes and thought I might pass out from pain. Literally. I've taken DayQuil for two days... just to get through the day. I've taken NyQuil for 3 nights, just to get through the night. Somewhere at like 3am the NyQuil gives way and the pains come back. I think the fever is gone, the nausea has., for the most part, dissipated, but the body aches... holy cow.
In a positive light, I've probably lost 5 pounds. I haven't had any caffeine since Saturday. And, as we are all aware, I resigned my position which can only mean life will get somewhat easier... at least I think. Lastly, being sick with the flu has forced me to go to bed because my body simply can't make it a whole day and I've had the opportunity to watch nearly the entire second season of Weeds.
My company has offered to contract back to me on a minimal schedule with what could be a pretty low stress, easy to leave behind, no big huge looming deadlines kind of work product. I also have a potentially long-term contract for a really huge company doing a really cool cutting edge project with my favorite Microsoft product. I also have three other companies who would like to talk about potential ways of working together (and this is with only telling two people, aside from the readers of my blog, that I resigned my position)... so all in all, things will be fine financially and I can basically nail down exactly what I want... and I think what I want is to work a modified schedule, only during the hours the kids are in school... and that's it. As long as I stick to my guns, this should be completely attainable if not somewhat convuluted in mapping out how to get there. Making sure I take on a big enough project to pay the bills and make long term income but small enough to fit into the lifestyle.
All I can hope for is health right now. I haven't been this sick in years. It is a doozy. I hope tomorrow I can stand up straight and not wish I was laying down.
More happy blog posts to come.... as I wash over the dreads of this stressful period... and move on to a more balanced, satisfying and happy life.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:54 PM | Comments (3)
April 11, 2007
Next Stop On The Journey
Flu.
Agony.
Miserable.
Full day of requirements analysis today. I took DayQuil on the hour long commute up.
I also resigned my position with my company on my way up.
No, I don't have a new job. I probably won't get a new job in the near future. I will just do contract work. I can dictate how, what and when and, more importantly, if. The Husband and I debated the merits of keeping my job vs. his. It boiled down to the fact that I *CAN* work contract and he cannot. I'm a little nervous. Contract means a bit more personal responsibility than I really want... but it also means I have more control over my schedule.
I hope this means my mat will see more floor time in the near future.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 5:12 PM | Comments (7)
April 10, 2007
Desperation
So I started that cleanse/diet thing on Sunday... I came down with the flu on Sunday night and was in desperate straights yesterday. I called The Husband crying and told him I needed to go to the hospital. I gave up the cleanse/diet about noon and tried to eat some toast... I had spent most of the morning curled up in a ball vascillating between wanting to go curl up around the bottom of the toilet and looking at the leftover drugs from my surgery wondering if taking them would make it all go away.
Yesterday was one of the most miserable days of my life... a literal nightmare of aches and pains, cold then hot, nausea... and a lot of restless sleep. The Dog stayed right next to me all day... she never left my side.
Today I am better though still sick. I took the entire day off work yesterday and felt horrid for it. I shouldn't feel horrid about being sick but we a) don't get sick leave (yes you read that right... I have to take my vacation time to be sick) and b) the deadlines don't go away. I have to make some tough decisions this week... but my brain is too foggy to think straight.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:35 AM | Comments (4)
April 8, 2007
Agony
A - G - O - N - Y
That's where I'm at today. First day, no caffeine. I'm miserable. It doesn't help that, in general, I hate cranberry juice (and I'm supposed to have like 8 glasses of it a day) or that I feel like I'm getting sick (or maybe that's the caffeine kicking my ass).
Practice this morning. Sauna. Heavy, tired... no Motrin, tight back.
Afternoon. Nap on bed, too tired to think straight.
Tomorrow. Figure out my life (probably not the smartest thing to do on day #2 but I don't think I'm going to have a choice).
Posted by ashtangagirl at 8:25 PM | Comments (3)
April 6, 2007
So inconspicuous
The Dog seemed really out of it yesterday but a bit better today. You know you love your dog when you get home from a really long day at work to discover the poor thing was constipated from the anesthesia and couldn't get her poop out... so you do what could be categorized as one of the grossest things you've ever done. You got the big huge dried up chunk out of her hair for her. I've raised two children and changed countless diapers.. and, yet, somehow this seems worse.
I was going to talk about my interesting day today at work (well, interesting to me alone) but I think I'm just going to go take a bath. I somehow can only smell dog poop.
Ewwww...
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:38 PM | Comments (0)
April 5, 2007
WOW
No, not another Windows Vista post... and, better yet, not another Ashtangi.NET post. I'm completely over both. Windows Vista is pretty cool and glitzy but, really, so far, I don't see anything I couldn't do with Windows XP. I love pretty shiny new things though and, more importantly, I still love the synthetic, chemical new computer smell (it just about beats about new car smell). Ashtangi.NET is what it is and will be what it is. I continue to feel that if I just open my heart (and, in this case, my fingers to run the site) with positive intentions that the actions of a few can't ruin anything. So blog in peace, blog with love and compassion and, most of all, blog with the remembrance that we all are supposed to be practicing the 8 limbs of ashtanga yoga. Ahimsa, ahimsa, ahimsa.
So WOW!
I canceled kids yoga today so that I could make practice at the studio. I haven't been to the studio in way too long and I'm so over-burdened with my own self-deprecation that I needed the intensity of a regular practice. I had to take Cinny to the vet for her spaying and, unfortunately, it took til after 9am to get her admitted and, so, practice didn't happen. But that IS life and the moments all move on. Never fear... Kiran teaches a noon class within which we can do Mysore... so I drove over to the health club, began my practice and a different teacher walked in. I was a bit bummed at first but life is life and so I continued on.... I started off feeling heavy, detached and completely unwilling to be there.... at some point, something switched and I was in the moment of the practice all the way through... I got some really nice and interesting adjustments... and then came Kapotasana. I prayed... for a long time... in other words, procrastination... I did it once on my own, fingers just past toes... came up... prepared to do it again and the teacher asked if I wanted an adjustment. I said sure. She asked how I wanted it so I asked her to take my hands to my feet before my head hit. She started the adjustment completely different... holding my upper back... and then she didn't let my hands down on the ground when... THERE WAS A WHOLE HEEL IN THE WHOLE OF MY HAND.
Then panic set in.
Pure, unfiltered, panic.
The teacher said "Inhale..." to switch I exhaled. "INHALE!" exhale... okay, okay... inhale... now she goes for the other hand and I completely give way to the panic and let go. She has another student come and hold my elbows down once I've put my head down... pulls me further... super deep into the pose... come up and feel like I may just have moved to another planet and forgot all my baggage.
The guy next to me says "Are you okay?"
I say, "No."
But, really, I am.... and I am so full of the moment and the feeling that I realize grabbing my heels is ALL ABOUT my mind. This isn't to say that I know how to let go and realize it but I at the very least am conscious where the "hang up" so to speak is.
10 dropbacks... assisted dropbacks... my back feels like it has a coil of energy spiraling up through to my head.... oh... kundalini... is that what that is?
In wierd news: after posting this I went and read my On This Day archives. This is a marked day for me apparently.... I was given Krounchasana on this day 2 years ago and last year I was given Kapotasana on this day. April 5... who knew.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 3:44 PM | Comments (5)
April 4, 2007
Seriously?
The real post of today is below... now on to the administrative bullshit.
I'm done. I have gone through and added every blog which was emailed to me between whatever day and today. I'm through. The only exception is one of the blogs which has, apparently, surprisingly, been deleted. I tried. I also found two blog requests in my junk mail. Fortunately one was emailed today and the other appears to also be now defunct blog.
I don't have time to police, inspect, detect or otherwise about a freakin' blog on the freakin' Internet. I simply do not have time to read all the links sent to me, determine if it is an honest person, honestly wanting to blog about the honest practice of ashtanga yoga.
I sorta thought it would work that way... being the site is about blogs about the practice of ASHTANGA YOGA... humans will be humans... and please remember I am also a human who was and is simply trying to create a useful and time saving piece of functionality to help out your day (and, truthfully, mine which is how Ashtangi.NET was originally created... as a website I built for myself).
So duke it out and leave me out of it. Or, as I've previously offered, feel free to email me with your interest in assuming responsibility for the site as a whole. I know a lot of the teachers have been successfully using the traveling teachers and workshops links, I don't keep track much of the other links but we get a fair amount of traffic everyday if that helps.
Seriously.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 11:33 PM | Comments (3)
Just Got To Relax
Flew up to Oakland last night. I had ordered a car service to pick me up when I got there. It was one I just found on the Internet. I called as we were dis-embarking and the dispatch told me that the driver would be there in 5 minutes. He instructed me on where to stand.
I waited 30 minutes.
The thing is I don't think I'm a bitchy traveler or overly picky. But, if I'm (or whatever corporate entity I am representing) paying $100 for a trip and I made a reservation, I sorta expect you to be online... and okay, even 15 minutes late isn't horrible... but 30 minutes.
The limo, for 12, pulled up. I don't mind using car services. I have found over time that, more often than not, it's not so much more expensive than a cab... but I hate when you arrange for a car and they send the stretch limo. It's downright embarrassing. I step into the stretch limo, the driver, who never exited his vehicle and looks as if, quite possibly, he hasn't walked around the block in 10 years and taken a shower in 10 days. We move off... and about 5 minutes in I discover that the "bar" portion of the limo (which is the span of one side) has empty wine glasses, a half empty glass of some alcohol and an empty wine bottle.
Gross.
I sent an email with a complain and, of course, have never heard back. Oh well, guess the cab would have been just as easy.
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I spent from 7am to 2pm in a full-bore, crank it out, really difficult meeting. Actually it was a requirements analysis where we go in and we talk to the business stakeholder. The one who could really give a shit less about the technology or the right way to architect a solution... she wants her portal and she wants it NOW. It is very difficult to do a technical requirements analysis and define WHAT you are building and that includes the very technical "HOW" -- you must have a good mixture of both. You can't do a what without a how. It's my job to stitch that fine line together into one solid architecture. We never left our chairs except to eat a half slice of really horrible pizza.
I'm not even sure we succeeded. I guess we'll see how I fill in the holes. Sink or swim so they say.
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I hitched a ride to the airport with my clients. The CIO and project analyst for a large west coast company. Another difficult new role in my current job description is treading the fine line between "Yea, we are doing this work together, let's be friends." and the "I'm here because I have a job to do, let's just do it." Makes for an interesting 24 hours together.
When we pulled up to the rental car place I saw this guy that looked familiar getting out of his car. I knew instantly who I thought it was but I thought "No way, what would be the random chances in this insanely small Ashtanga Yoga World (because let's face it, it really is a small community) that it would be that guy. I had never spoken to that guy before but I've practiced next to him a few times when I made an early Mysore in L.A. (remember last year when I was constantly up in L.A. for my last job?). I looked at him a couple times and then he recognized me. He said he noticed my ink which I thought was funny. We introduced ourselves and talked a bit. He had just been to Mysore with his two daughters (whom I've seen practice with him sometimes).
It's a small, small world.
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The Son finally built his NXT today. Now to come through with the promise to program it... this would have been no problem in previous years but, right now, my brain is just too tired to think straight.
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I am truly worried that I don't have the guts to get healthy again. I'm nearly obsessing over my fear of "all the things I have to give up." Yet, I look at my diet and my body and my spirit and I think "Holy shit! How did I slip THIS far down the rabbit hole?"
Posted by ashtangagirl at 10:31 PM | Comments (0)
April 2, 2007
What I DId Today
OMG she looks like she's 16!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I got her excited enough about the glasses (she was originally devastated). They are, of course, Barbie. I wanted her to get the cool hot pink and lime green RayBans :)
Posted by ashtangagirl at 9:00 PM | Comments (3)
Like A Pear
The title came to me in the tune of Nelly Furtado's "I'm like a bird..." except "I'm like a pear... " Last night I had this revelation that I'm like a pear.... Pears are not good when they are perfect, when they are young... pears reach their peak when they have some age, a bit of bruising, a bit of softness. I reached that peak I think... a bit of padding from bearing children, a bit of age with time, a bit of bruising (okay not just from Bakasana)... and now I've moved past the peak of pearness and I'm entering the zone of bad pear-dom. That's when the pear has too many bruises, is a bit too soft and squishy and is slowly becoming an aged and skipped over pear.
My skin looks swallow, liver spotted and I have roscea (I think that is what it is called). I developed that after pushing The Daughter out (burst blood vessels - yes, you push that hard). I've been putting on fatty deposits from a combination of eating like crap and not practicing 6 days a week. My body feels toxic, heavy. My belly has a bit of a roll now which I've never had in my life. The Husband told me this morning "We're aging!" Well yes but there is aging well... and I'm only aging moderately well.
The Husband told me he has been seeing this peak within me for a few months now. That traditionally, I have to go way one way, way the other way and then find some balance. It's like I have to experiment with both extremes to figure out how to make the pieces work in my life. So I've been there. I've done the progressive lifestyle, everything we ingest, put on our bodies, ideals we hold, etc. is "crunchy granola" and I've done the reverse "Sure honey you can have that Gatorade as a special treat." Now it's time to find the ideals and bring life back under control (well, as much control as one can ever have in this thing we call life).
So, Sunday I am starting the Fat Flush diet/cleanse. I've never done a diet in my life but the first two weeks of this plan are like a mini-cleanse. Not stringent because I can't do stringent with my current lifestyle but enough to get my ass back on a healthy bandwagon. I don't know that I'll ever do the lifestyle plan, I just need a jump start to remind myself what it feels like to be healthy again.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 11:38 AM | Comments (7)
April 1, 2007
A Bit Pissy
Whether this is a result of the fact that I got my moon today or just a sign of the times, I'm a bit pissy about the blog community right now. As the administrator of Ashtangi.NET, full-time professional, mother, wife and hopeful ashtangi, I simply don't have time to evaluate, investigate, censor or read all the blogs signed up for Ashtangi.NET. I created a community for that reason: community.
I don't care if you have blog wars amongst yourselves and you'll likely not find me involved in them... but when it gets brought to my doorstep, well, I don't like it. I then have to make a decision about whether to get involved or not. To that end, when someone emails me and asks me to add a blog, I do. I don't normally read them or investigate their owner. So please don't bring the flame wars to my doorstep by creating fake blogs within which to vent your frustrations and otherwise drag out the blog war scene. If you were one of the recently created blogs that I didn't add yet because of this issue (and I have 4 sitting in my inbox right now), I am getting there but the ridiculousness of some people is creating more work for me in that I now feel I must read a blog to see if it is actually a person instead of someone's notion of humor or something much less funny.
If you make an official "Leaving Ashtangi.NET" post, I'll likely remove your blog. I also remove blogs when someone hasn't posted in a year and I notice the stale RSS feed. This all takes a lot of time so if I see someone wants to be removed, I remove them instead of having to catch a stale feed 12 months later. None of this is magic, it requires human intervention and time.
For those of you already getting your hackles up and spewing at your computer, before you comment, before you email, think if you are ready to take over the reigns both from a time and financial perspective. I'm more than happy to turn over the administration and cost of this site to someone willing and devoted to it.
And, in the famous words of most of our mothers, if you don't have something nice to say, why say it at all.
Posted by ashtangagirl at 1:33 PM | Comments (25)