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January 8, 2004
Yoga Groove
A couple weeks ago I went to yoga really really angry. So angry that I wasn't sure it was a good idea for me to walk into a yoga class -- all that negative vibe. I went anyway and stayed in the corner. I had the best practice... just really peaceful and meditative, physically connected with my breath and my body seemed to be strong. Ever since that day my practices have been dramatically different... where I might fade in and out of awareness, I'm able to go right back to the breath. I've been centered and focused and, for some reason, much stronger. Last night's practice was just profound for me. It wasn't overly strenous of a class - Wednesday night is usually a prep class with vinyasas between sides and Hanumanasana thrown in - but I had such a sweat -- the same amount of sweat I get doing a full first series class. I was feeling really good when we got to Utkasana and I was simply just amazed when I jumped back from standing for my Vinyasa -- I actually felt like I didn't squat as much, my legs were straight, I "floated" more. I'm not sure that physicall I did any of that, in fact, I doubt it, but the feeling was there... maybe everything was just physically clicking but it was very cool. I was able to successfully capture that feeling several more times in the practice. More importantly to me though was that, though my mind wandered, I was able to quickly come back to the breath throughout my practice. None of this was the mind blowing part for me though... I've heard of this... in fact, Kiran mentioned it when I saw her on the street the other day... but I've never come close... and last night I did. While in one of the forward bends (and right now I can figure out which one it was) I had this overwhelming sensation of tears. I didn't burst out but, if I had let go, I certainly could have. I couldn't place the emotion and I was fully connected with my breath at that point so I don't have any idea what the thoughts could have been but I felt it. It was dramatic and it was also a little scary. In other news, coming up against the wall from my backbends I've discovered if I give myself a little tiny push off the wall about half way up then I can let go of the wall and come up the rest of the way on my own. I'm not sure if this push forward is what I need to figure out to do with my legs in order to get up on my own but I imagine it must be something close to that sensation of pushing out with my legs.
I am officially in my new office today. It's very lovely and as soon as I can find the cables to my camera I'll post a picture. Now it's back to work to pay off the lovely office :)
Posted by shanti at 12:16 PM | Comments (4)