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September 1, 2002
100 Things About Me
Alright, everyone else is doing it... and here I sit, on the edge of my seat, waiting to see if The Daughter will wake up tonight...
1. I am, according to the computer at the gym, 32.9 years of age... my birthday is in two weeks.
2. I am the stereotypical Virgo
3. I am 5'11"
4. Before my pregnancy with The Son, I was 10-15 pounds overweight. Before my pregnancy with The Daughter, I was not overweight at all -- I was perfect for me.
5. Now I'm 20 pounds over the pre-The Daughter weight but figure it won't go away until I stop nursing.
6. I'm hopeful yoga will solve the weight problem.
7. I realize it probably won't.
8. I love to cook but I don't do it enough.
9. I harbor a wine fetish but I'm still learning how to pick them.
10. Today I picked up my first "cellar" wine.
11. I don't have a wine cellar...yet.
12. Yoga is my passion.
13. I feel sick to my stomach when I miss a class.
14. I've been married almost 8 years.
15. DH is 8 years older than me.
16. I cut my hair off every couple of years...really really short.
17. I never wear make-up.
18. Okay, a touch of mascara but nothing else..ever.
19. I love DKNY and Calvin Klein underwear...
20. They don't make bras big enough for my boobs.
21. I've been dreaming lately of taking a holiday from my kids.
22. I could probably never bring myself to do it -- even for a night.
23. I was vegan... but now I've been eating meat and some dairy.
24. I'm very conflicted about this - I'm not sure what it means.
25. I'm not very political.
26. I'm an aspiring Buddhist.
27. I feel out of touch with nature living in a climate that has few seasons.
28. I love big tall trees...the taller the better.
29. I really don't enjoy going to the beach that much but I love the ocean (I live a few miles from the beach).
30. I sometimes think my "healing" is all a bunch of bullshit and I'm really just completely fucked up.
31. My son is obsessed with space... it's freaky to read about how tiny we are out here in the universe.
32. I have problems making and keeping girlfriends.
33. My best friend and I have been friends for almost 18 years...he's a he.
34. I have horrible posture.
35. I hate nails of all kinds on anyone.
36. I also hate facial and body hair.
37. Fortunately, DH has no hair on his body.
38. I've always thought of myself as attractive and wonder what it would be like to not be attractive.
39. I usually get what I want.
40. I have to be careful of what I want.
41. Having a daughter scares the shit out of me.
42. I've secretly always wanted to learn to play an instrument...preferrably piano.
43. I know I misspelled that but am too lazy to fix it.
44. I'm not even half way done and I'm running out of things to say.
45. I can't wait to travel the world.
46. I used to live in Japan.
47. I had a boyfriend named Randy once, we had a pet ant... I killed it.
48. My mom loved that boyfriend...she wanted me to marry him.
49. I am the blacksheep of my family. I'm 180 degrees different than everyone in it.
50. I'm a programmer by trade.
51. I'm bored with it.
52. I want to a nutritionist or a psychologist.
53. I often wonder if I'll ever be able to go back to school.
54. I'm sexually repressed I think.
55. I'd like to be more adventurous.
56. I'm really trying.
57. I love, love, love to read.
58. I love twisted fucking novels. *Thanks Fel, The End of Alice is twisted*
59. I judge a bookstore by whether or not they have a copy of Geek Love (of course, with the Barnes & Noble/Borders phenomenon this doesn't really apply anymore).
60. I can't understand why DH doesn't like to read novels.
61. I've sworn to never buy another parenting book again but I'm dying to buy To Kindle A Soul.
62. I'm apparently a little too frank - I've been told this twice recently.
63. I don't notice I'm being frank.
64. Did I mention that I love yoga?
65. I'm somewhat ecstatic and terribly heartbroken that I'll never have another child.
66. I sometimes wonder if I'll end up divorced.
67. I sometimes fantasize about being divorced.
68. I love to eat out at really expensive, nice, good food restaurants.
69. I have a terrible habit of spending money.
70. I'm horrible at maintaining a budget as a result.
71. I am really great at making greeting cards... people often ask me to make their invitations.
72. I feel like I don't spend enough play time with my kids.
73. I think I will only nurse until The Daughter is 2 but, then again, I can't imagine weaning either.
74. I plan to remove my boobs and get fake ones when I'm done...but I am a little freaked about it now that I know they can't keep my skin, nipple and areola.
75. I hate my legs..I think they are hideously ugly.
76. I think I have a sexy back.
77. I sometimes screw up the words I'm trying to say and feel embarrassed about it.
78. I overanalyze EVERYTHING.
79. I was sexually abused pretty much my entire childhood (see the reference to healing above).
80. I find that parenting well does not come instinctually as a result.
81. I'm not a jealous person.
82. I'm really black & white about most things and rarely see much grey.
83. I hate living in suburbia and long for more space.
84. I drive an SUV...a luxury one at that...but its bought and paid for.
85. I've been trying to find some good erotica but haven't turned up anything that turns me on.
86. I think my mother-in-law comes and plays with my daughter in the night.
87. I find it funny that I'm not afraid to tell anyone that.
88. People tell me I'm funny but they can never describe in what way.
89. I sometimes feel like this clumsy, tall, amazon woman.
90. I love to get massages.
91. I like to watch TV in bed.
92. I swam competitively for 12 years.
93. I gave up all college scholarships for no good reason.
94. I paid for college.
95. I strive to know who I am and why I am and what makes me tick more than anyone I know.
96. I think people think I'm pretentious because of that.
97. I really believe that we all have different experiences in our lives for a reason and that we have to live our own truths.
98. There are people on the net that would be surprised how I feel about them - those that probably think I harbor hostility would be surprised to learn I don't and those that think I probably respect them would be surprised to learn I don't either.
99. I think my husband is my soul mate...even if I sometimes forget it.
100. I feel a lot of love for nearly everyone.
Posted by shanti at 9:32 PM | Comments (6)
To Jois or Not?
So, Patthabi Jois is in town. If you don't know who he is then you know nothing. Kidding... He's the guru, the father of Ashtanga Yoga and he's here on his world tour...supposedly his last (of course, they said that last year). I didn't figure I was anywhere near being prepared to attend one of his workshops so I pretty much wrote it off when I heard about it awhile back... Saturday my yoga instructor told me I should go then my friend told me he was actually doing an Intro class today. If only I had gotten said friend's message earlier because The Husband was already in the water surfing and so I didn't get to go :( *SOB* Tomorrow he is doing the full primary series... I don't think I'm ready for that but, again, said friend, said he'd go and we could both check our egos at the door (you did say you'd leave yours at the door with mine, right?) -- the problem, the class is from 7 to 9am. The plan... if The Daughter sleeps tonight, I'll go but, frankly, there's no way I can do the full primary series with Pattabhi Jois if I don't get any sleep. I'd have to leave more than my ego at the door.
Posted by shanti at 9:05 PM | Comments (4)