I haven't blogged in a really long time. Months. I started blogging January of 2002 and maintained a consistency in blogging for the following 7 years... I stopped blogging recently because I just didn't feel I could write about anything other than the near non-existent asana practice. I always enjoyed blogging as part of the experience of getting to know myself, not just documenting the everyday passage of life.

I've been thinking about starting to blog again for the past week or so... I'm not sure what I want to blog about. My life is so different than what it has been or what I thought it would be at 40 years of age. I'm a mother of two children. I've been separated from their dad for about 3 years now. Those 3 years have been a major upheaval in lifestyle and internal direction. I've hit lows and highs. I've been worried about myself, I've let myself go, I've become more mainstream... but I'm finally started to find a place of comfort. It feels like the next part of my life is finally beginning.

Practice has not been my priority. I sometimes feel a distinct sense of sadness for the amount of time I had for practice before. In today's world, spending 3 hours to do yoga every single day is a rarity. I sometimes dream of having a simpler life... taking a job that affords me the ability to practice, to do something that achieves a greater good but I've come to accept that I do what I do because I'm really good at what I do and I like what I do and what I do is part of who I am. What little I am practicing feels pretty good. I've gotten better about home practice lately but I'm definitely not at the physical capacity I was once. I have been practicing the Hanuman Chalisa and I'd say I'm like 1/3 of the way through memorizing it. You can chant in your head on an airplane!