I've spent a lot of time testing beta code. In fact, it was fun and I'd really enjoy the opportunity to live on that cutting edge line again... it's just that my job is no longer to do that... and, yet, I'm faced with doing just that. My issued laptop doesn't even have a CD-ROM drive... I'm not cut out to work on development.

My head isn't just bloodied on software and technology... it's bloodied on the lessons I just keep repeating... over and over... like a broken record. My friends will all recognize it... it's the repetitive pattern of failure that I haven't let go of... in so many respects. I'm so very tired.

It seems like if I could just let go of everything that things would just ride along for awhile... but it seems like letting go of everything is just too scary.

We are up in the mountains... kids and TWBD snowboarding...or, rather, attempting. Yesterday The Daughter fell through some ice... it was drama... she was in there for awhile before a nice snowboarder came and helped me get it out... but I was surprised at the number of people who walked on by.

I'm ready... for the world to change... for people to notice people again... for me to learn my lessons.

Now cracks a noble heart. Goodnight Sweet Prince,
and may flights of angels sing thee to thy dreams. ~ William Shakespeare