I miss my life. It's not that I miss life really... there are just aspects I really miss. I really miss the knowledge and the security of a daily yoga practice. The upheaval and travel schedule don't afford me that security blanket anymore. It's like they say... what good is the yoga if you can't use it when it counts the most and, right now, it counts the most. It counts oh so much... I remind myself daily "Just breathe" -- it's the breath... not the poses, not the discipline of showing up... it's being able to still your heart and your mind and breathe when breathing matters the most... just breathe.

I miss my teacher.

I miss my friends.

And, yet, strangely I feel like life is just now unfolding... like I've finally stepped into a boat that has not holes and I just need to learn the specifications, the individual energy to row it.. the specific way it moves to the right or left... or how to tilt the oar just so to get it to go in a straight line. It's not like things are perfect or I've got it all worked out but I feel like I've made solid decisions to my own benefit and I'll somehow arrive, driving the straight line to the nearest boat dock.

I was blessed tonight with the energy of good friends... of people I can afford to cry with, who don't tell me I'm crazy and who try to tell me where I'm looking at something like an idiot and where I'm not being honest with the situation and at the same time tell me how proud they are to know me. Those are good friends... that is the energy to fill one's life with. I sometimes forget how much love and light I have in my life... when I invest the energy to manifest it.

Thank you to my friends... I love you.