Lena's Painting
It took me a bit to decide on a picture for tonight. I think this might be a great exercise... figure out some picture I can take for everyday. I was sorta hunting around for something to take a picture of that reflected some part of how I felt today.... after taking some pictures of this really cool Buddha head The Husband once got me, or the cool wood on our dining room table (the only thing in our house that I really helped pick out)... I caught a glimpse of the painting in my office and decided it was perfect.
Today I officially decided not to go to Rolf's workshop. That sucks. I was totally looking forward to that. It would be silly thought, I can't practice and I don't think I could sit through a pranayama workshop and I have to be in L.A. on Monday... still sucks no matter how I justify it.
The Husband asked me tonight why I justify what I'm gonna eat. I had said that I was going to have ice cream 'cause I've had such a crappy day. He told me I should just have ice cream to have ice cream. I told him I'm way too analytical for that... there's always the reason why.
The Daughter won the Super Star Award today at gymnastics camp for "flexed arm hang." When I asked what that was the coach told me it was her holding herself up to the parallel bar, chin over the bar, elbows bent, hanging... and that The Daughter held herself the longest of anyone and, so, she won the award. As I waited for The Daughter I thought about what this says about her. She's five, she's competitive clearly, otherwise she'd have just dropped without effort... and, yet, she's like "yea, so... I could feel my muscles... at first they were all really hurting, like I could feel them from the inside... but then it was okay and Joanie almost won but then she let go." Pretty cool. She's strong and she's determined. That must be such a powerful feeling to have at five. It took me to 35 to feel that way.
I'd like to feel proud about it but I doubt it has much to do with me. It's just who she is within herself, the part of us that isn't touched by the silly things that go on around us. We all have that little part... the part that makes us us and not in the ego sense.
Today I attempted downward dog. Stupid.. yes... but I didn't have my palms flat and I was like no way...nope...this is stupid. It's like my body is going just as crazy as the incisions are itching. The Husband said "Well, your body is used to stretching every morning. I couldn't imagine not stretching every morning." It's true. Since the day I met him, The Husband has gotten up in the morning and, at some point, before or after shower, but ALWAYS before his day began, he stretched. It is part of his routine. I guess I never really noticed it before.
Then he said that and I thought, yea, you're right.
Today I officially decided not to go to Rolf's workshop. That sucks. I was totally looking forward to that. It would be silly thought, I can't practice and I don't think I could sit through a pranayama workshop and I have to be in L.A. on Monday... still sucks no matter how I justify it.
The Husband asked me tonight why I justify what I'm gonna eat. I had said that I was going to have ice cream 'cause I've had such a crappy day. He told me I should just have ice cream to have ice cream. I told him I'm way too analytical for that... there's always the reason why.
The Daughter won the Super Star Award today at gymnastics camp for "flexed arm hang." When I asked what that was the coach told me it was her holding herself up to the parallel bar, chin over the bar, elbows bent, hanging... and that The Daughter held herself the longest of anyone and, so, she won the award. As I waited for The Daughter I thought about what this says about her. She's five, she's competitive clearly, otherwise she'd have just dropped without effort... and, yet, she's like "yea, so... I could feel my muscles... at first they were all really hurting, like I could feel them from the inside... but then it was okay and Joanie almost won but then she let go." Pretty cool. She's strong and she's determined. That must be such a powerful feeling to have at five. It took me to 35 to feel that way.
I'd like to feel proud about it but I doubt it has much to do with me. It's just who she is within herself, the part of us that isn't touched by the silly things that go on around us. We all have that little part... the part that makes us us and not in the ego sense.
Today I attempted downward dog. Stupid.. yes... but I didn't have my palms flat and I was like no way...nope...this is stupid. It's like my body is going just as crazy as the incisions are itching. The Husband said "Well, your body is used to stretching every morning. I couldn't imagine not stretching every morning." It's true. Since the day I met him, The Husband has gotten up in the morning and, at some point, before or after shower, but ALWAYS before his day began, he stretched. It is part of his routine. I guess I never really noticed it before.
Then he said that and I thought, yea, you're right.
Comments
Mr. Facing Inward is very full of wisdom today. I like what he said about eating. Very wise!
Countdown to Dr. X!
Posted by: Lauren | August 11, 2006 1:37 AM
Hmm definitely way to analytical about the food.
As for the daughter, just proves you are doing all the right stuff, despite what you grew up with and what you have to deal with. You don’t necessarily directly contribute to that part of her, but you've provided her all she needs to get there on her own. As a parent, I think that's all you can do at times. You have every right to feel proud.
Does your doctor approve downward dogs so soon after surgery? Yes sounds stupid to my nonmedical ears. How about trying "restful dogs" "or "sleeping dogs" instead??
Posted by: ciodude | August 11, 2006 3:04 PM
After my surgery (hysterectomy) the first full out pose I tried was the standing bow, and man did it feel great. It was a little scary with worrying that things might pop or dislodge, but I did wait 4 weeks and went in slow. Just hold in your mind how good it will feel when you finally are able to practice again. It is there waiting for you to be ready!
Posted by: Patti | August 11, 2006 7:13 PM
I just don't have much to say these days, but so it goes. Today was a total loss. I guess it doesn't bother me.
Posted by: Sten58638 | January 7, 2007 8:26 PM