The Husband and I stayed up late last night to watch Olympic Snowboarding Half Pipe. I wasn't surprised when I woke up before the alarm and thought "I'm tired!" Finally rolled out of bed and to the studio... was happy to see OKRGR there again (this meant a heater and warmth in the prep room). I hemmed and hawed a bit over starting practice and then when I started my body groaned and refused to cooperate. I had the brief idea of rolling up my mat and walking out. It's a good thing OKRGR was there or I might have ;) No, I think I have too much discipline for that these days but I did accept that my practice wouldn't be the explosion of good energy I had last week. In the end, I had a really nice practice... my focus was there and my passion for the practice remained. All the good things were coming.... the room was super crowded today... the most crowded I've seen it in a long time. As I've mentioned, I rarely remember the physical parts of my practice unless I'm really struggling... I only really came to when I got close to backbends and the dread set in. Actually the backbends themselves weren't so bad, in fact, they felt pretty good. On my third one Tim came over and said "How many?" I said "3" He says "What going slow today?" I didn't want to say that I was putting it off as long as possible. In the end, after dropbacks, he did the one handed lift again. I got a bit scared and wasn't ready when he was on 3 so I said "no no wait, wait" and then I rocked a bit more and came up. Tim said "Oh you are back!" Back from what I don't know but with a little rocking it seemed much easier.

I noted, while doing this exercise, that what happens is that that intial lift, my mind goes real blank and it's like I'm not engaging my body and mind... and then I sorta come to and I go "oh, I'm coming up" --- this must be where the fear lies.