The place where the kids have swimming lessons is right around the corner from some type of alcoholics center. It is not a rehab but maybe a halfway house is a better description. There are always homeless people in front of this place as well as recovering addicts, etc. We frequently park just down from it and walk past it to get to our swimming lessons. This morning as we were walking by there was an old homeless man sitting on the bench. This is nothing new but something about his vibe just sat with me. I don't know what but I just felt touched by him - not in a special spiritual way but in a way that said I should give him some money. So I got my wallet and found I had a few dollars and I gave them to him. The Son & I talked about how he had no home, no money for food, etc. and we hoped that maybe he'd buy some food with the money we gave him.

After our lessons we were walking back to the car and The Son asked if the man had left to find "a house he could buy." I told him that we hadn't given him enough money for a house but that maybe he went to get some food. Turns out, he was still sitting on the bench.... a paper bag sat at his feet with a large can of beer. I was disappointed. I felt conflicted.

On the one hand, I wanted to give him money simply because something in him moved me and I felt it was right. I don't feel I should judge what he uses the money for just that my intention was in the right place should suffice. On the other hand, I know some Buddhist scholars feel we do need to be cognizant of what the intention of the receiver will be... that we shouldn't give handouts to those that would use the money for ill will whether it against others or themselves and that we shouldn't support anyone's addictions. So I'm trying to figure out how I feel about the situation. How would you feel?